Reading on the loo and other stories | Jabbering Journo column

Where do you read?
Where do you read?

Now I’m no book snob.

I read well-worn paperbacks in the bath, in bed, lying on the sofa, while cooking (book balanced precariously against a bottle of olive oil, soy sauce or let’s be honest - wine) while burning my tea.

But even I, who prioritises reading over self-care rituals such as painting my nails (they’ll be fine for another week) a day at the spa ( a frothy book will do) or ringing my friends (okay, that one is anti-social) and definitely rate reading above a gym visit (no explanation required there), draw the line at reading on the loo.

I’m not saying I’ve never done it but I once read an article about the myriad diseases one could carry about in the pages - and it was scarier than The Exorcist or Silence of the Lambs.

So I’m a reformed character and stick to more sterile environments.

This is possibly because I’m not from Newcastle - where research has proven that the porcelain throne is the most popular location to delve deep into a nice - fairy tale.

Luckily for the NHS and humankind, tastes generally lend themselves more towards more hygienic reading spots such as a train, a sofa or the garden.

According the Book People’s survey of 2,000 adults, it’s concluded we are all crime and thriller addicts, followed by mystery and drama - which explains why soap operas do so well.

I was surprised to see romance languishing at just 27 per cent in the ‘most popular’ charts - it seems we would rather see someone dead than a happy ever after, which perhaps explains why our crime stories do so well online while the happy stories people say they want to read - barely get a look in.

Although over the county line in Leeds they do prefer a self-help book or two - possibly because they all need to move to the superior red rose county to feel better.

But I’m just glad to see that it’s not just me who spends her time off up to her eyes in fictionalised worlds that take you away from the realities of day to day life.

Reading is an education in itself - I know ALL my best words from books - but ploughing through novels on the loo will provide an unwanted lesson and a scary ending.